I am married. My wife is aware of my "hobby," having accidentally stumbled across some of my hosiery & high heels. We had the usual talk: "Why do you do it?" ("Because I like it and because it turns me on."), "How long have you been doing it?" ("Mumble...") "Are you gay?" ("No"). I say "the usual talk" because I think it's more or less the prototypical conversation that goes on when a crossdresser talks to his SO for the first time about his crossdressing.
She is extremely uncomfortable about it, so we don't talk about it anymore. Nowadays, I still only do it when she's not around, and she does not ask me about it.
She does not know about Nicole.
Transforming my boy self into a boo-ful woman is a skill that I have built over the past fifteen years or so. I guess I am good enough at it that it does not matter that I look "normal" in boy mode, yet the transformation can change me drastically, into someone so different from my "normal" self.
OK, OK, so "normal" is relative. You may wonder about my smooth hairless appearance for example. I am blessed with very little body hair, so right off the bat, I'm way ahead of the game there. My long hair? Well, what's so unusual about a geek in a high-tech town with a pony tail?
My eyebrows? That's a bugaboo, but not too difficult to deal with:
I pluck them, *very* gradually.
When Do I Do My Photo Shoots? How Do I Find The Time To Go Out Shopping En Femme?
I dress when she's not around.
She goes to work very early, and has the kind of job where it's not
possible for her to go home mid-day, and I have a job with very
flexible hours, so I have plenty of opportunities to dress & go
out shopping en femme, and do photo shoots.